Honest.

(This post is a bit heavy so if you're looking for something cheery, you may need to come back later)
I mentioned yesterday in my video that I'm somewhat of an overachiever. By somewhat, I mean completely. Wanting to be your best is definitely not a bad thing but for me, I have found myself comparing myself to others rather than comparing my current self to the person I was yesterday or the day before. I've noticed this feeling getting stronger in my last year of college. I've always struggled with body image and comparing my looks to others but recently, it's shifted comparing my accomplishments academically to others. Now, that may sound silly but I feel as though our society is just geared more and more towards competition as we get older. As I get closer to graduation, I see people talking about their GPA, research experience, GRE scores, MCAT scores, club memberships, how quickly they are or aren't going to graduate. Everything feels like a competition. Who has the most difficult major? Who has the most majors? Who applied to the best graduate schools? Who is graduating with the highest GPA? Etc. 
It's overwhelming. I'm trying to do my best. Get the best GPA I can. But I can't help but feel inadequate compared to every other college student. I have no research experience. I haven't done an internship yet. I don't have a 3.8 GPA. I'm not double majoring. I don't have a minor. I haven't taken the GRE 2 times already. I am not in a sorority or 5 different clubs. I'm just me. I've switched colleges 4 times in my 3 years of college. I have a above average GPA but not an amazing one. I don't know for sure what I want to do after I graduate. I'm taking 7 classes this semester, three of which are accelerated and I'm feeling like I need to drop one of them but then I stop myself because I start to compare again. 
I'm me. I need to do what's best for me. I need to be the best version of myself. No one else has everything I have to offer. 
Rinse and repeat. 

Comments

  1. You got this!!! You always lose when comparing yourself to others. Also, people can talk a lot of game, but you have no idea how miserable they may be behind closed doors! Do what's right for you, the best YOU can do. Life is all about priorities. A 4.0 GPA not being your top priority doesn't mean anything more than just that. Screw everyone else, you're awesome!

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    1. You rock, lady. Thank you so so much.
      xo

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  2. You totally got this. I know you do! As long as you're doing your best, that's all that matters. If you get a slightly worse GPA this year, and you still did your ultimate best, then take it, and run with it. Being lazy & under-achieving is what should make you kick yourself for. You got this, girl!

    we&serendipity

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    1. Thank you so much for the encouragement <3

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  3. Awww dear I'll be praying for you!!!!! :/

    Love,
    manda
    http://meandjesus-amanda.blogspot.com

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  4. So glad you stopped by my blog girl. I feel the same EXACT way. Seriously.. I've been an overachiever all of my life, but then college came along and everyone else was like me, and most of them I feel are better than me at a lot of things. I'm not in a sorority, I'm in one club, but it's really just a church group. My GPA's pretty good, but not spectacular and certainly nothing to boast about. I tried searching for an internship this summer, but I don't think it's going to pan out for this year.. It gets me down a lot, but I have so many other things in my life besides school to be thankful for (they're much more fun too!)

    You've got a new follower my dear, maybe we can support each other on this crazy journey they call college.. oh and finding a job, I'd like to have one of those! Ha!

    :)

    Kristina
    kristina in retroworter

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    1. Thank you so much for this. It makes me feel better to know I'm not the only one!
      And for sure! Let this blogging friendship begin!
      xo

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